Becoming Grand

When my mother first found out that she was going to become a grandmother, you would have thought that she had been sentenced to the gallows and boiled in oil…Seriously. She made a pronouncement that she was not to be called grandma but "nana"…I think that she viewed being a grandmother as a declaration of the end of her youth and the beginning of her end. I, having just become "grand" feel that it is the beginning of my immortality. And with the ways things are happening today, more parents are becoming grandparents at 35 than enough. I am soooo glad that didn't happen to me.

I really didn't think I was ever going to become a grandmother. I don't believe as some, that it is my child's duty to become a parent so that I live to see another generation. I accept a lot of things in this life and well---since, I didn't think it was ever going to happen it was okay with me. But- when I found out that I was going to become grand---wow! I started writing a book for this new person coming into my life. I felt a revitalization that is inexplicable…And my initial reaction to the news of this new life coming into the world was an incredible flood of love...I kept asking myself how I could feel so much love for someone I had never met.

There are so many great things about crossing this new threshold in my life. First, I have lived long enough to see it. And, two, I have become a part of a pretty exclusive group of people which some cultures call "the elders."

One of the biggest perks of "becoming grand" is that you get a surrogate mother that you gave birth to and you know pretty well who will go through the pregnancy and labor. At the end of the gestation period there's this wonderful brand spanking new human being who you can spoil, adore, cuddle in your arms and shower with all the love you can muster in your heart.

Another great benefit is your kids finally understand what being a parent is really all about. This is something that brings a new common ground that bonds you with your adult child. They start to finally get you and all the things that they thought were kooky about you and the undying dedication to protecting one's young.

I also like being able to say to my daughter, "when I had you----", as my mother's generation used to say, "back in my day."

I've been asked what will my granddaughter call me…Who cares? My hopes are to get to see those pivotal moments: when she starts to smile, when she discovers laughter, gets an "owie", loses her first tooth and becomes her own person…

Nothing can compare to looking into the eyes of the newly born who is a part of you. They stare, but don't stare, they try to focus while life outside of utero is an incredibly different experience for them…I look at this new life and know that I had everything to do with her being here.  (see What If: A Mother'sversary story)

I LOVE being grand… I love telling people that I'm grand…I love saying my grand boo's name: Pepper!…With each new generation that comes from me is the hope of a new consciousness of peace, understanding and togetherness among people, not colors or cultures.