Love’s Greatest Heartbreak

 There is no greater silence, no greater stillness…Like a walk in the sun without a shadow…A quiet irresolvable silence that crashes the ears….  Finally the understanding of what forever really means,  I share the feeling of loss with all of those who have also felt the heartache of losing a mother. I hope  that here I can be the voice that can express what some of us cannot...

You look for a road ahead and sometimes it all seems foggy. Our lives come full circle only to understand the unwelcome embrace  of loss: a generation lost to  us in body  and fading to a mist of memory in spirit.

Every day, I listen and hear nothing but the silence as I look forward. The silence is deafening. I just can't make out what's ahead...

Somewhere the reality of this great loss does not surface for us until this- a reality it becomes. We know it will happen, but until it happens, we get lost in the surrealism of what we must accept. I understand the words "no more", yet my mother's soul is all encompassing. I feel her energy each and every day. 

My mother was fair of face, Monday's child, born March 7, 1921.  She was a beautiful woman  with a classic photogenic allure, poise and a winning captivating smile. Her tough as nails exterior concealed the squishy emotions that she kept protected behind a brick wall  reserved only for her own soul... To know her feelings one had to listen to the music that she enjoyed. It painted a canvas of her triumphs, defeats and challenges. 


When my mother was 72 years old, in 1993, she planned and paid for her funeral, burial and made her last wishes known; from the officiating minister to the song she wanted sung...I am consoled that I was able to give her everything she wanted and more.


I find legacy in the things that she left behind and how she handled unforeseen circumstances in her life. Throughout her 89 years, she spoke through her singing, her poetry, her heart and from her very spiritual soul. And while the world may be a little different because she is gone, it is certainly a better place because of the many lives she touched…

So many shared with me the wonderful things that my mother had done and what a purely generous and giving individual that she was. She never spoke of what she did for others... She just lived  her life's credo by the song she wanted sung at the celebration of  her life.

Whoopi Goldberg  made a most eloquent statement about losing her mother:

'I think I’m just sad sometimes because I think, 'Who will love me the way that she did?'

For those who have yet to know and still have your mothers, I celebrate their lives and accomplishments with you.  For all of you who have experienced this loss,  I embrace and comfort you as we find  strength in celebrating the greatest love of our lives.